It’s 2016: Back to work!

It’s that time again…

Time to get back to work tomorrow. I can’t fully put into words how much this is not thrilling me.

First of all, having to go through all the hassle of actually getting dressed like an adult. I think I’ve spent the majority of the past week wearing a variant of what I call Holiday Dress. This comprises what I’m wearing currently, which is some Mickey Mouse sweatpants, a Mickey Mouse t shirt (do you see a theme here?), a sweatshirt covered with emoji (including my favourite pizza emoji) and topped off with a bright pink hair towel (because I can’t be bothered to dry my hair, ever).

Notice what I didn’t include: bra.

Now, I like bras. They make your boobs look a nice pert shape. They stop you from feeling like your puppies are heading southwards during meetings, and for some unknown reason they seem to be attractive to men. But I am the kind of person who takes every opportunity possible to loaf around not wearing one. I get home after work and immediately revert to my betracksuited state. It just makes me feel nice and relaxed. I even take the dog out without one (me, not the dog – he never wears a bra!) although it is winter so I think it’s okay as I’m wearing a coat and I don’t think you can tell the state of my boobs underneath it. On some holiday days I don’t even wash my hair! Cripes! 

So the first thing I’m not looking forward to is this: Dressing like an adult. Including harnessing those puppies into “business attire”. Ugh. 
 
Included in the yuckiness of going back to work is the idea that I have to get up approximately 5 hours earlier than I have become accustomed to over the past two weeks. In the beginning, I got up around 9am but over time this has stretched to 11-something. I know. It’s terrible. But I figure I may as well get some benefits of not having a baby / having to go into work. I gotta say, I enjoy the lie ins although I think I’m probably sleeping similar amounts – I just stay up really late reading books in bed. (The kindle is both a wonderful addition to my life and a sleep-sucking machine.)

Dog has not been 100% over Christmas so we’ve tried to rest him at home, which means we haven’t gone on long walks like we usually do and have spent most of the time hibernating. It does mean I’ve had the chance to read a good few books, which was nice. T has been back at work for the past few days – he didn’t have all the time off in the in between time – so I’ve had lots of nice quality time with Dog just lying on the sofa and reading. He’s a good snoring companion!

We also got to do lots of fun stuff over the break. I posted on my last post about all the fun stuff we did in the lead up to Christmas… We also had a really nice Christmas and new year. It’s a great time of year I think!

On Christmas Eve my parents arrived. Our place is too small for them to stay (we have some sofa beds but it’s not really suitable for my parents!) so they stayed in a hotel. We went out for dinner on Christmas Eve to a nice local pub, and I think it’s just nice to have reached that stage where you can treat your parents (though they still treat me a lot). On Christmas Day we had them round for a traditional Christmas dinner and T’s parents came too, so it was really lovely. They actually met for the first time last Christmas Day! Fortunately it went well so we did a repeat. I even managed not to burn the turkey or the veggies, although T probably did most of it!  

Our flat is completely Christmased out. I don’t really think you can believe it till you see it, but let’s just say the usual reaction ranges from “OMG!” to general expressions of delight (young people) and being flabbergasted (older people). One entire wall is a fairy light wall. The entrance hall has a real 6 ft Christmas tree and then in our living room we have a giant artificial tree which goes to the ceiling. It is decorated with all the decorations we’ve collected over the past few years, mainly from Disney, and presents we’ve received from friends. (Thank you MPB!) It feels really nice and I’ve insisted on putting the lights on every day I’ve been at home, so I can enjoy them before they’re gone! We exchanged a lot of presents and I got some really cool stuff. Although not as much chocolate as I would like! (This is probably a good thing.)

T got me an automatic milk warmer to make hot chocolate (my favourite drink). And a huge box of chocolate spoons which you stir into hot milk to make hot chocolate. He also got me the biggest pack of marshmallows I’ve ever seen! I got him a remote control drone – it’s really quite fun although Dog goes a bit nuts when it’s flying around the flat. We got lots of silly little presents too. I love Christmas!

 

We did have one moment which was slightly awkward when my dad remarked on all the Christmas and Disney stuff (including my latest Lumiere from Beauty and the Beast, who sings Be Our Guest… Awesome), and said “All this stuff, who’s the child around here?” – I think my mum almost killed him with her death stare. Anyway… I’m okay with it. I think that yes, we do have a lot of childish stuff. We enjoy Christmas and we enjoy Disney… I think that’s okay. Maybe we never have a kid and we carry on enjoying it. Maybe we do, and the kid gets to have parents who love childish stuff (which I reckon can’t be a bad thing either way).

Anyway, I digress… Christmas is over. New Year has started. It’s 2016. That’s nuts… That’s the future. I don’t know what’s going to happen in 2016. What I do know is how I’m starting it. Fatter than I’d like! I figure I have around a month to try and lose some weight before we start IVF #2. I don’t want to go too mad on it as I’m not sure what would be worse – crash dieting or being overweight. I think there’s so much for us all to feel guilty about and I keep telling myself that fat people get pregnant all the time! And drunk people… And smokers… Neither of which I am. I actually felt sick after new year’s drinks and I wasn’t even drunk, so I think I might do a Dry January like most people seem to do. Anyway, we need to try and get as healthy as possible, within the time frames. I put on weight during the first cycle and I haven’t lost it… And it’s been Christmas… So everyone is fatter, right?!

We had a nice new year celebration. A few people in our building had a party and we were invited, which meant we had a nice social event without having to leave the building! Dog even made a guest appearance – he was chased around by our neighbour’s cat. I think the cat came out better. Anyway I made another cake to celebrate 2016… It was very chocolatey!

  
It was really nice to see lots of people who all live in our building and new year saw us up on the roof watching the fireworks over London. It was freezing but we had a pretty good view!

Ah, the holidays. Still… Half a day left! Eek! I have 10 minutes of my Scandinavian thriller to finish reading, and I’m wondering if I can manage to read another book before tomorrow’s reality kicks in?! I managed to do my first attempt at knitting yesterday. It’s on a loom I bought from one of those random shops where you end up buying loads of stuff even though you’re not sure what you went in for. I am bad at finishing things so hopefully I will finish this! I probably won’t!

  
My face tomorrow morning…

  
I really am NOT looking forward to getting back to work tomorrow. Aside from the dressing-myself-in-stuff-without-pictures-of-pizza-on thing, and the having-to-wear-a-bra thing, I am NOT looking forward to seeing that woman (the b**** who asked me if I was pregnant) who unfortunately before Christmas I ended up having to do some work on the same account as. She’s an absolute cow and I can’t avoid her if I work on a certain client as she works exclusively on that account. Without going into a big whinge fest she also managed to upset me before Christmas so I really don’t want to see her again. Also she could sit at any desk in the office but decided to sit on my row! Seriously! It’s like she’s just trying to annoy me. The other point is that she is now really obviously pregnant so it just is a daily reminder of how I’m not pregnant. (Typical that the biggest b**** manages to come back from mat leave and pretty much immediately get pregnant.) Life isn’t fair!

Other than that, I’m hoping I can manage to get on a good project in the new year. I have a few things in the pipeline but nothing confirmed and I think it’s more than my sanity’s worth to end up on something like last year’s where I ended up working 18 hour days and travelling and not sleeping, all during IVF #1. I’m hoping that I can try and get more balance this year and particularly for our second attempt at IVF. I bought a load of extra vacation days so I am intending during stims that I’ll take time off rather than try and fit all the scans in between work stuff, which was really stressful last time round. Hopefully I will be all calm and zen like rather than stressed and worky!

 

So… Happy New Year everyone! (Everyone knows new year diet only starts tomorrow, amirite?!) 
I’m not really into making new year’s resolutions (other than my perennial desire to lose some of the excess weight and get fit etc) and so I’ll try and leave it fairly open-ended. I want to be happy, and for those around me to be happy. That’s all.

I don’t know how or when this happiness will come about but I’ll try and do my best to encourage it. That includes trying not to feel bad about stuff that I can’t change. I can’t help being infertile but I can try my best to make things happen and focus on the good stuff rather than the frustrating, horrible stuff. (I can ignore work b**** until she goes on mat leave I guess… I need to stop getting riled up about her even when she’s clearly being annoying and awful.) I can try hard at work and do my best to get good results. And I can spend quality time with Dog and T and my friends and family.

It’s not all a trick of the mind, but we do have some stuff within our control… How we choose to live our lives, in a positive way or a negative way. I’ve kind of had enough negativity in 2015 so I’m hopeful that 2016 is gonna be more positive! And if it isn’t, I’ll deal with it!

Go get ’em, 2016!

  

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32 comments

  1. Surviving Infertility

    Happy New Year! I was laughing as I read this post because I can so relate. I dont want to go back to work this week either, I dont want to wear a bra, I dont want to get up early, or dry my hair, etc. Good luck tomorrow!!!

    Like

    • Nara

      I know! The thought of drying my hair… I never dry it and often get into work with a wet coat because it’s dripped all over it. I’m SO sophisticated! (I actually ordered a hair drying thing from Amazon which I’m hoping will help… But it’s out of stock so haven’t received it yet!) It’s just that thought of having to go into work tomorrow – yuck! Hope your Monday goes well! X

      Liked by 1 person

  2. mamajo23

    I love your writing! Glad you had a good break and wish you so much luck tomorrow. Maybe you can plan something special for tomorrow night or next weekend so it isn’t such a let down to be back at work?? Xo

    Like

    • Nara

      Ahhh thanks! I think we will be too tired to do anything but come home and hang out with little Woofer! I’m looking forward to my coffee tomorrow morning – perhaps that will make up for the rest of it! ๐Ÿ™‚ xx

      Liked by 1 person

  3. thegreatpuddingclubhunt

    I’m with you on the bra thing!!! And the ‘diet’ or healthy eating ways definitely starts tomorrow ;-p I weighed myself for the first time since the end of IVF 1 and I have put on 10lbs since then :-s It might have been all the chocolate, mince pies and alcohol I’ve been scoffing. I don’t think I’m going to have time to lose that before round 2! But anyway, I think it is better to have enjoyed yourself over the festivities and to be happy that way than worry about the few extra pounds. I hope you enjoy the last moments of the holidays and here is wishing a very happy and peaceful New Year to you ๐Ÿ™‚ I hope the return to work goes well too!!!

    Like

    • Nara

      Oh I have put on at least that! I am the heaviest I’ve ever been. I really don’t have time to lose it though either. Maybe a couple of kilos will be possible. When are you due to start? Are we going to be IVF buddies?! You’re right (as always!), it’s definitely better to be happy and have enjoyed the festive season!
      I hope you have had a really lovely holiday and wishing you all the best for tomorrow too! ๐Ÿ™‚

      Like

      • Nara

        I know! I really feel challenged by the weight gain. I spoke with my sis about this and she said she felt the same. It’s tough that we get the downsides of pregnancy without the baby!

        I’m due to start downregulating end of Jan and stims in Feb, so you’ll be ahead of me. Reminding me what the next stage is!

        Oh and I’m posting waaaay late here. Can’t sleep! Need to reset my body clock with a three hour sleep!!

        Like

  4. MrsD

    I’m also dreading going back to work tomorrow- the thought of getting up EARLY, putting on actual pants and a bra, and facing a few annoying coworkers is just waaaay too much! I need to take down the Christmas decorations today, but can’t bring myself to do it because a) I’ve gotten way too accustomed to laziness and b) it means vacation is really over.

    As far as your coworker goes, think of it this way, if she is pregnant that means she will eventually be going on leave again and you will get at least a while when you can go to work and NOT have to see or hear from her for a while. That’s what got me through a similar situation with my coworker.

    Like

    • Nara

      Thanks! Yes I estimate she must be around 5-6 months pregnant so I only have to put up with her for a few more months. I really do hate her though! I’ve tried to be nice, but she’s just so… horrible! Agh, I’m sure I’ll get over it. (Plus if I get on an offsite project then I won’t have to see her – yay!)
      I can’t quite believe I have to get up early tomorrow, walk Dog, shower and get dressed and somehow get to the office, all before 9! (Or 10 probably! Flexitime!) It’s not a nice thought at all! ๐Ÿ™‚

      Like

  5. valleyally

    I’m dreading work too. Luckily once upon a time I read an article that said the best way to not get the January Blues was to go back to work a day later than most. So, ever since that quick read I have always taken one more day. Not sure if there is any truth to it, but makes me feel better to go back to a shorter work week.

    Good luck! I will be not far behind on Tuesday.

    Like

    • Nara

      Haha, that’s awesome! I’m very impressed with that Jedi mind trick. I don’t know if it would work. I think I always feel like I’ve had loads of time off even if I have one day extra, so perhaps that will be my plan for the year – long weekends! ๐Ÿ™‚ Have a great back to work on Tuesday!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. flatwhitetogo85

    Ha ha – this post made me laugh so much (apart from the part about bi*tch-features). I can totally relate to not wanting to have to put on ‘normal’ clothes, wear a bra and dry my hair. I’ve spent every spare moment of the holidays in my PJs and it has been glorious ๐Ÿ™‚

    Good luck tomorrow! Hopefully cow-bag can go and torment some other person for the day.

    As for the diet, don’t stress too much (easier said than done I know). Like you say, there’s so much to feel bad or guilty about.

    I hope 2016 brings you lots of happiness x x x

    Like

    • Nara

      Thank you! I’m so glad I’m not the only one who seems not to want to put on a bra and generally act like an adult! (I’m sure my clothes smell of Dog and I DON’T EVEN CARE!) Not so keen on the idea of washing my hair and actually brushing it either. I hadn’t brushed my hair for about a week and I tried to brush it a couple of days ago – it took about 10 minutes to get all the tangles out! AGH!

      I’m trying to ignore the idea of b**** features. It’s a slight consolation that most of the people who’ve come across her (including the VIPs) generally think she’s a nutter. (She has an interpersonal chip missing, I think.) The reason she works on this one client (back office job) is that nobody will have her on their projects! It just gets my goat that she’s so rude all the time and I have to see her so often!

      Anyway… BREATHE! ๐Ÿ™‚ I hope that your 2016 is awesome and that we all have fun tomorrow! ๐Ÿ˜€ x

      Like

  7. TryTryAgain

    Brilliant post!!! Laughed out loud at the bra comments ๐Ÿ™‚

    I wouldn’t worry too much about losing loads of weight – better to be relaxed and comfortable for round two than stressed out and starving yourself. Let us know how tomorrow goes and looking forward to your next round just around the corner xx

    Like

    • Nara

      Thank you! I didn’t realise there were so many people who aren’t into bra wearing either… I thought it was just me! (I am not going to burn my bras… My puppies need scaffolding! I’d just look like a sack of potatoes without – wait, that’s what I’ve looked like for the past week!)

      Thanks for the support and encouragement as well. I’d like to think you’re right about the dieting! I can’t help feeling like I should do EVERYTHING to make it happen (like losing weight) but then I’ve reminded myself that I’ve been much thinner and all the weights in between and I’ve never gotten pregnant before. So I don’t think it’s my weight that’s preventing it! Anyway… I’ll be concentrating on that from end of January or something so we shall see!

      Liked by 1 person

  8. tidleone

    Love it. The first part of your blog describes the last 2 weeks of my life exactly. Back to being a bra wearing, professionally dressed and well groomed teacher tomorrow, I much prefer the holidays: lie-ins, joggers, hoodie, no bra, no hair products or straighteners and plenty of settee cudales with my dog.

    Like

    • Nara

      Hahaha! I’m not sure I ever get to “well groomed”… I have quite boring hair so it’s all I can do just to wait for it to dry and drag a brush through it! I (stupidly perhaps) bought a hair drying/curling thing (not actual curls, like a heated brush thing which is meant to be good). I don’t like hairdryers at all so I thought it might make a difference, but it hasn’t arrived yet! I do quite like putting on makeup though – I always feel like I’m playing dress up. Hope your first day back at school goes well tomorrow! ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

    • Nara

      Hahaha so true! I wish we had a shorter week. Although I think I only needed to take 4 days off between Christmas and New Year to get two weeks off, so I can’t really complain! ๐Ÿ™‚

      Like

  9. Recurrently Unlucky

    I know what you mean about going back to work… That’s why I’m so glad I still have one week to go! ๐Ÿ˜ But good luck with it! Since you’ve reading so much, do you have any recommendations? My fav book from 2015 was “The Truth about the Harry Quebert Affair” by Joรซl Dicker, have you read it? I recommend! About dieting, I’m trying to convince myself to go gluten free and possibly diary free until next treatment… It’s supposedly good for reducing inflammation, especially on immune related issues, so I guess it’s also good for endo, in case you want to give it a try. Though I think you shouldn’t if it’d make you more stressed, not worth it. Crossing my fingers for your next cycle!

    Like

    • Nara

      Thank you! I read tonnes so I’ll have to put that on my list. I am so bad at remembering books, seriously! I forget them once I’ve read them most of the time. The biggest one I read in the last year (I think it was this last year but could have been 2014) was We Are All Completely Beside Ourselves. I *loved* that. You shouldn’t read anything about it beforehand though as it would kind of ruin the twist.
      Looking back through my Amazon orders 2015 (eek I spend half my salary with them!) I really enjoy anything by RJ Ellory. Candle moth was the last one I read and it was fantastic. I am amazed by how different and fantastic his books are. (I like Tess Gerritsen too for easy reading crime stuff but it’s not really in the same league. I enjoy her and Helen Fitzgerald as authors and buy all their stuff.)
      I read a bunch of young adult fiction too… I really enjoyed Every Day by David Leviathan. Oh and I went through a phase of reading everything by Tamar Cohen. I really read a lot as that is just the standouts looking back from December to July! ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

      • Recurrently Unlucky

        Wow, you do read tonnes! I’m adding them to my list, but right now I’m trying to finish “Is you body baby friendly” before my consultation, which is not exactly a fun read… Let me know what you think of the Harry Quebert book if you decide to read it! It has so many twists I dare you to guess the ending!

        Liked by 1 person

      • Nara

        I definitely will see if I can get hold of it! Sounds fun! I read IYBBF but truth be told I skim read a fair bit of it. It’s tough going! But I really am pretty convinced that there must be something like that going on.

        Liked by 1 person

    • Nara

      Dairy free is an idea but I think giving up dairy (cheese) would make me really sad… I keep thinking I should try vegan as I hate the idea of hurting animals. But I never seem to get there!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Recurrently Unlucky

        I think gluten free is the most important for inflammation if you can manage it… I think I’ll give that a try. Giving up cheese will probably be one of the hardest for me too. But vegan I really couldn’t, I love meat (and fish) way too much… But I try to stick to organic, grass fed or wild stuff. As long as they live a happy life I’m ok with it.

        Like

      • Nara

        Wow… I live for bread. I mean, it’s in pizza! Might have to see if it is possible. I find that a bit scary though! I wouldn’t know what to eat!

        Liked by 1 person

  10. Courtney

    I’m braless right now, and I like it that way!!! I hate week days because they require a Bra first thing and I like to delay as long as possible!

    Happy 2016! I think you’re going to have an awesome year!

    Like

    • Nara

      Hahaha. Yeah, I really prefer not to be constricted. But I do acknowledge it makes me look better to wear one… And I don’t like the feeling of them flopping about in a formal environment! ๐Ÿ™‚ I just wish they were a bit more comfortable!

      Liked by 1 person

  11. ourgreatestdesire

    omg, I want a piece of that cake, like, now!!! And I’m all about no bras also. I personally hate them because my boobs actually have bruised my ribs so wearing a wire bra is no longer feasible because it hurts too much.

    Like

    • Nara

      Haha. I’m with you! I actually took to wearing unwired bras. I don’t know if you have Uniqlo? I usually wear their “air” bra and unlike some it’s quite supportive and doesn’t look flimsy/like a crop top. I’m 32C and their size S fits me, and when I was IVFing I bought a Medium, though my boobs shrank back after the miscarriage. Anyway I really want to go back to my massive collection of sexy lacy bras but I want to lose weight first, as they feel too tight right now! I really don’t like the wire digging in, though it’s much worse since I put on weight. I still harbour the hope that I’ll go back to my thinner weight and be able to parade my skinny bum around in skimpies again! ๐Ÿ˜‚

      Liked by 1 person

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