I’ve caught up on blogs so it seems only fair to post an update myself. But of what? I feel like I don’t really have any news, similar to what I say to my folks when we talk on the phone.
How are you? What have you been doing?
Oh… Fine. Just been working. And sleeping. And working. Had a relaxing weekend.
I guess the great unsaid is When are you going to have some good news about our grandchild?
But we’re just… Waiting. As ever. I think there should be a guidebook called The Infertile’s Guide To Waiting. And in it, there would be lots of blank pages with “…” written on. And maybe every now and then there would be something like “Perhaps you ovulated!” and “Attend someone else’s baby shower/christening/etc”.
Of course, there are some extremely good things. We have finally taken down our Christmas decorations! I’ve had some nice home time with T and Dog. Doglet really is the cutest thing in the world. Even when days are rough, he does seem to provide some nice enthusiasm (probably about food) and unconditional love (probably about food). And let’s not forget T; the guy has the patience of a saint and is pretty cute too. I mainly love the fact that he is extremely enthusiastic about things, like Christmas or his next big idea. (I’m waiting for the next thing. I’m sure it will be good. We might even go on a date next week as our friends want to dogsit!)
Meanwhile, I’ve had all sorts of irritating minor drama at work. It’s fairly dramatic and involves She Who Needs A Slap In The Face, but it’s just too boring to go into… Suffice to say that the pregnant one turns out to be five months pregnant rather than the seven or eight it appears, which means she’ll be bothering me for another four months. Urgh.
The other thing I’ve been thinking is how annoying it is that women can’t complain about women without it being a Women Thing. It’s like people automatically assume that any sort of unreasonable behaviour is purely down to my hysterical interpretation of a situation [because I’m a woman, therefore hysterical] and not because there might be some inherent problem with it. It’s tiring being in a work situation where people are so political and talking about each other all the time. All I want to do is get on with my work and enjoy it. Is that too much to ask?!
Other than that, it’s just… Waiting.
As I mentioned in my previous post, my NHS clinic has agreed to delay starting IVF until March based on my request to [insert vague excuse for getting a second/third opinion here]. My main reason for wanting to delay is to get some further investigations, mainly to see if there’s any reason for the fact that I’ve never gotten pregnant naturally, and our one IVF pregnancy ended in miscarriage. (I know, I know, prevailing logic is that it’s just luck of the draw, yadda yadda, but I’m the type who wants to see if there’s an actual reason. Quite frankly one miscarriage is bad enough – I don’t know how people go through the mandatory three before getting further investigations.) We had one second opinion which I described in my previous post, and now we’re waiting for the appointment with the clinic that specialises in reproductive immunology, so we shall see.
Meanwhile… I had to pick up my IVF meds. Because the prescription’s only valid for one month. As I mentioned in my previous post, I tried to get the NHS prepayment card because it’s cheaper to pay up front for the drugs. (It’s small fry compared to what it is in the US/Canada/etc, but still, why not try and save money so you can spend it on expensive RI diagnostics, eh?) I couldn’t buy the prepayment card because the system showed me as still having a maternity exemption card (from my miscarriage in July, which T sent back when I begged him to). Well – turns out the NHS says you can use it until it runs out. In February 2017! When Pizza Baby would be a year old, if I hadn’t miscarried. T had sent it back so the guy at the end of the phone expressed his sympathies, reiterated that it was still valid and I was still exempt until next year, and sent me a new card.
You can imagine how strange it feels when you go to pick up your IVF meds. (For those not in the UK: Most people pay a small sum for prescriptions in addition to the National Insurance contributions we make through our pay packets which pay for the NHS. Some groups are exempt, like old people, kids, students and expectant mothers.)
Do you pay for your prescriptions?
No, I don’t. [Pushes NHS Maternity Exemption card across the counter]
The script taker just wrote on the prescription that I had a maternity exemption card. But the dispensing pharmacist was more savvy. She knew what those drugs were… Fertility drugs. A few months’ supply of Buserelin, Menopur, Ovitrelle and Crinone… I’m clearly not pregnant.
She eyed me suspiciously.
Have you had these drugs before? Do you pay for your prescriptions?
Yes… Err… I’ve checked and I’m exempt. [Stared right back. Pushes card across counter.]
I told this to my sister (who unfortunately was in exactly the same position, a few months after me, and who also had a maternity exemption card which she sent back)… You have to brazen it out.
So here’s the thing…
If you’re willing to brazen it out, you can get all your IVF drugs for free on an NHS maternity exemption card.
You couldn’t make it up.
Every cloud has a silver lining, and all that…