How did it get to be that time? I’ve been rather lax about blogging of late, for a number of reasons. Last time we spoke was way back in week 8, and since then I have:
- Started a new job
- Been madly packing up our apartment
- Bought a house (well, an apartment/flat – it is London, after all)
- Been waiting to get through the next milestone (our 10 week scan, this weekend)
Any one of those things would be kind of a big deal, but for us, it seems like it’s happening all at once.
Another reason I’ve sort of taken a break from blogging, apart from the fact that I’ve been busy, is that I’m still anxious about this pregnancy. I’m now 10 weeks 1 day and I haven’t miscarried, and I have various symptoms, but I really don’t feel like I have faith in this pregnancy yet, although I’m choosing to distract myself with thinking that it “might” happen. I mean, it will sort of happen if/when it happens and I have no control over it, but I had to take myself away from the constant pregnancy / infertility stuff for a while, just for my own sanity. So I’m sorry if I haven’t been as supportive as I could be to any of my blogfriends… I am thinking about you (and I went on a comments jag yesterday so catching up!) – I will be back properly soon, I promise!
The other reason is one of the pregnancy symptoms, I think – I am so tired! I feel absolutely exhausted most of the time right now, especially in the afternoons and evenings (oh and when I get up in the morning – so all the time then). I can’t even describe it. Maybe it’s that I usually have coffee every morning and whilst I haven’t entirely sworn off coffee, I have only had it very occasionally. But also I seem to be hit with this kind of uncontrollable tiredness in the afternoons, and it’s all I can do to get home and get to the sofa and then to bed! It. Must be a pregnancy symptom as I really am usually a minimum sleep night owl.
Anyway, here are some updates:
I am really enjoying it! It seems to be going well, subject to a few minor hiccups that will hopefully iron themselves out. (Eg I have a man reporting into me who seems sort of resistant about the idea of reporting into a woman – he’s going to have to get over that pretty quickly. And the tech isn’t quite what I was used to!) All the people I’ve met seem to be great. My new boss is awesome. The first day on the job he was called away and told me to take the second day off! So funny. And when I’ve told him about various things, he says not to worry. And he’s taking me (and others) sailing tomorrow… Life could be worse. I kind of can’t believe that I’m being the most I’ve ever been paid to do this job (which doesn’t seem to be very stretching so far… A nice kind of pregnancy relaxing job, as T said) but I’m thinking it’s maybe the calm before the storm. I’m trying to enjoy it whilst it lasts!
T has been quite cross with me about how slow I’ve been to pack. I don’t think he fully appreciates the pregnancy symptoms which manifest themselves as laziness! Probably because I’m quite lazy generally! Half our apartment (a big open plan studio) is full of boxes. It’s good I have T because he keeps telling me what to do. I’d never do it on my own!
All moving stuff is incredibly stressful though. Trying not to stress about it as it can’t be helped. Just massively annoying it’s taken so long to resolve when we should have been able to move in a nice relaxed way when I was working my notice period. Fortunately new job seems reasonable and I think they will be okay with me moving.
We exchanged and completed on our new place! Finally! We pick up the keys tonight. This is super exciting and long overdue. We last saw the place (tiny tiny!) 5 months ago which is insane, so we finally get to go and see it tonight. We probably won’t move until next week.
Ooh, I’m back from picking up the keys and seeing our (our!) new place and I’m pleased to announce that it is still lovely! Well – it’s teeny tiny but I love it. It’s in an old building (we only live in old buildings it seems!) and has lots of characterful features (eg wooden beams you bang your head on if you’re tall, which I’m not). I can’t wait until we are properly settled there.
I’m still pregnant as far as I know! Last week I did a funny thing. I decided I’d always fancied going in one of those floatation tanks, and they had a Groupon offer, so I did it! So funny. It is like a big bath in a giant egg. You go in for a whole hour!
I quite enjoyed it really. It’s weird to switch off (no wifi!) but not unpleasant. Floating is fun. The one thing I would say is the salt water kept irritating my eyes – I wear contacts and I probably should have worn some goggles. Because of the heat and humidity you sort of get drips and sweat on your face, and then you try and wipe it off with your salty hands… Which means you do get stingy eyes. But maybe someone with not so rubbish eyes would be okay! Anyway I might do it again at the right price. It’s meant to be a bit like being in the womb… I can’t say I remember it, but it’s a kind of pleasant feeling!
In terms of pregnancy symptoms (or what I think might be symptoms) I’ve had the following:
- Extreme tiredness as I described above. Always tired!
- Nausea / extreme hunger – I sort of feel sick when I’m hungry, and then after I’ve eaten I have a sort of crash, and feel like I have to lie down and sleep – it’s weird.
- Bad taste in my mouth – I really need to drink something fresh or something like that, as I end up having this sort of dry or bad taste in my mouth. I’ve noticed this a lot. It ends up with me drinking lots of water or eating fruit! Odd!
- Sensitive to smells – I’ve always had a keen sense of smell but I feel like I smell stuff really strongly now. I’m especially sensitive to BO on the tube or bad breath. Or food smells (like T had some corned beef which I can’t stand and I almost killed him!).
- Food cravings or aversions – I don’t know if it’s actual cravings but I definitely feel like eating certain things and not others. I’ve always been a fussy eater but it feels a bit different, like it takes me a while to decide what I want to eat at any point. I’m quite into clementines at the moment (healthy!) and weirdly not as into chocolate or pizza as I usually am. But in terms of meals it’s like I can only eat what I “feel like”. Today I had quiche! I can’t think of the specific things as it varies by day but it does feel a bit different than my usual faddish eating.
I think that might be it. Obviously stomach and boob swelling. Generally all over fatness. It’s quite horrible in that way and I feel very unwieldy but not much I can do about that. I stopped weighing myself last week as I was getting stressed. Also I feel so sick at times I just have to eat something.
It was Father’s Day in the UK last weekend. I think it’s the same most places whereas our Mother’s Day is different. I sent my dad a card with the 8 week ultrasound in and got an excited call from my parents on the Sunday! It was funny. They’re happy although obviously concerned for me after last time. I keep trying to temper my expectations with the idea that “if it happens” and so on. It sounds really negative but I can’t count on it just yet. Maybe at 12 weeks.
I got T a father to be card for Father’s Day! He seemed quite pleased. I didn’t even know you could get them but I saw it when I got my dad’s card and thought I should try it.
We voted today! For those of you not in the UK, I’m talking Brexit. I actually did a postal vote as I wasn’t sure if we would have moved by now, which we obviously haven’t – so I voted last week. I’ve never seen a vote where people were so vocal about it.
Two more days till we see our little baby again. I hope s/he has grown. The midwife said if we get past 9 weeks it’s seen as a good thing. So we shall see.
A final thought: When we got to our new place tonight, I had post! It was a letter from the hospital where I’ve registered, our new local hospital, giving us our booking appointment (the first appointment with the midwife to start planning the birth). It’s on a weekend so T will be able to come. It was a really nice thing that my first letter there was that.
The ex owners also left us a care package of food, tea and coffee, biscuits, crisps and chocolates! It was really nice.
Here’s to new beginnings… and staying pregnant. The next milestone!