Rites of passage (32 weeks)

I’m absolutely knackered. I think the lack of carbs is making me sleepy or maybe it’s just that I’m now 32 weeks pregnant. Today was pretty tiring, and the whole gestational diabetes and trying to control my diet probably doesn’t help. I’ve been controlling it pretty well with diet, which means my blood tests have mainly all come back within range, but the side effect is that I don’t have much energy. Although I think my bump has grown more this week so maybe it’s the effort of lugging that around!

This afternoon I had a workshop for three hours. Being fairly heavily pregnant, sitting in a hot room for hours and listening to people talk about fairly unexciting work stuff whilst feeling carb deprived and sleepy doesn’t really make for a pleasant afternoon! Anyway, I was fairly engaged until right at the end where they were droning on a bit too long. I was looking at my phone when one of the presenters (that client who did the racial slur on me when drunk) tried to call me out in front of the other people there.

I thought this was kind of funny-peculiar (not haha) because it seemed a really schoolteachery thing to do. It was like she wanted to try and embarrass me by asking me what I thought of what they’d been discussing, because she thought I wasn’t paying attention. Of course I had been half listening so I answered the question and provided an explanation. Anyway, I thought that was a weird and sort of combative thing to do, to try and put me on the spot like that. Also, who picks on the heavily pregnant woman and how does she know why I was looking at my phone? Her boss looks at his phone pretty much solidly throughout any meeting. And it wasn’t a meeting, it was a workshop with lots of tables and loads of people and I wasn’t the only one looking at my phone.

Not to weigh too heavily on it but I wonder if it’s got back to her that I mentioned the racial slur. (I didn’t make an official complaint but I did mention it to the PA I’m buddies with and I kind of didn’t care if it got back to her boss because she was waaay out of line.) Who knows. All I know is I don’t need a combative client to deal with at this stage of pregnancy. At least I’ll be off for a few months so I can avoid her for a bit! 

Anyway, I had to leave work on time (early! On time is the new early!) to get to our very first NCT class. I can’t even remember what it stands for, but these are basically antenatal classes (which you have to pay for!) for a few weeks before the birth. You end up in a class with other couples who are due around the same time as you. As one of the dog walking guys told me, “You’ve got to do it because you’re basically paying for pregnant friends!” I wasn’t particularly looking forward to it and quite honestly could’ve gone to bed as soon as I got in from work, post Dog walk.

In the event, the NCT class is held about 5 mins walk from our place so there’s not much excuse not to go, and it was actually quite entertaining. We were in a class of 7 couples of which 6 turned up tonight. What I found interesting is the comparison between couples that you naturally do when you meet new people… or is that just me?

Out of 6 couples:

  • Only 2 couples were white British. We live in a very diverse area and I’m so glad we moved there. I really like the idea that B won’t be an odd one out in his class or where we live.
  • One couple was the exact same racial mix as we are. And they live down the road!
  • Everyone lived really close together so in theory if we make friends with any of them, we’ll be walking/bus distance to all of them.
  • 4 couples were foreign or interracial. So for once I wasn’t the odd one out!
  • Everyone is due within a few weeks of each other. In fact at least 3 of us are due within a few days. I’m due second out of the class – 4 days after the first one. And another lady’s due 4 days after me. So it’s anyone’s guess who’ll be first!
  • I think we are the only ones having a boy!
  • 5 of the couples are planning to have their babies at our hospital.
  • I think I had the biggest bump… and I was paranoid that I was the fattest. That wasn’t the best feeling but I don’t think there’s much I can do about that.
  • All the women worked. It’s good to know as I sometimes feel the pregnancy advice seems to be geared towards women who don’t work. Which is fine but this week it suggested I take up swimming and catnaps during the day… I can’t really do that in the office!

 

I guess tonight was an intro so we went through some stuff about pregnancy and supporting your partner and whatnot. A lot of it was understanding where everyone else was at, what their plans were and finding out some commonalities. Probably not that interesting unless you’re having a baby. But it wasn’t bad as an initial intro session. I think the aim of NCT is for people to have a positive childbirth experience, so I guess that’s a good aim. Also it gets the men more involved, which I’m sure is nice for them as so many things are aimed at the woman. (T enjoyed it that we got to demonstrate pregnancy / labour massage on the men!)

The one thing I found worth holding onto was the following acronym which is meant to help you if you want to understand the reasons why you might be being forced down a certain treatment path and how you can make an informed decision in the heat of the moment.

B – Benefits – What are the benefits of this course of action?

R – Risks – What are the risks associated with this course of action?

A – Alternatives – What are the alternatives to this course of action?

I thought that was quite good as it’s a less confrontational way of asking why they want you to do something (like induction, etc). Apparently there’s a longer one called BRAINS but that is way too much to remember!

The other interesting thing was seeing lifesize cross sections of a woman’s body during pregnancy and how my stomach is apparently now up under my ribs! Who knew! I guess I thought it was underneath baby or something. Ha.

So all in all, worth doing. 

Tomorrow I have my NHS ultrasound which will be the first one since being diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I’ll be interested to know if B is still measuring big. I’ve started realising why people go on maternity leave early… I am definitely feeling this week that I have grown more and am tired with traveling around. I worked out this week I only have 3 more weeks of work before my Christmas break, and then after that I only have just over a week before I’m due to go on maternity leave – or less if B comes early. That is a bit mindboggling! We’re nowhere near ready!

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23 comments

  1. gwenniesgardenworld

    Both my sons came 3 weeks after their due date, I cannot begin to tell you how that felt ! Your baby will be there sooner than you think, time is flying !

    Like

      • gwenniesgardenworld

        Yes, they do now but 38 years ago they didn’t, they didn’t even do an ultrasound unless they suspected there was really something horribly wrong, besides it was not so easy to know the exact due date, it was more or less guessing, but when the doc gives you a date, you look forward to that date and by the end of your pregnancy you really hope the baby would come a bit earlier ….ha !

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      • Nara

        Haha! Yes I can imagine! I’m feeling okay as long as I don’t have to travel a lot, like I have to go about 1.5hrs today just for a 15 minute meeting! Ugh! At least it’s not in rush hour!

        Liked by 1 person

      • gwenniesgardenworld

        Ofcourse I have, I don’t know what is wrong but people have asked me this before. I had problems with my other blogs, I can view them but can’t add posts. They are called : gwenniesgarden and the other is gwenniesworld, if you google them plus wordpress then you can see them. I had to make a new blog: it is called gwenniesgardenworld cos I hoped that would be easier for my followers to find again. URL is https://gwenniesgardenworld.files.wordpress

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      • Nara

        It’s because the blog associated with your profile isn’t any of those. It’s rivofa.wordpress.com. So anyone who clicks on your name goes to that. You can change it in settings and then people will be able to click on your name and it’ll go to your blog!

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  2. sewingbutterfly

    I definitely noticed and uptick in my fatigue around 32 weeks as baby is getting a lot heavier! I enjoyed the antenatal classes we had (although ours were free). I am still waiting for baby to arrive and I am 41 weeks on Tuesday. The days are feeling incredibly long now :-/

    Like

  3. flatwhitetogo85

    I can’t believe that woman! How rude! It’s a good job you’ll soon get a break from her – she sounds like a total idiot. Is this going to be a one-off project or will you be doing ongoing work for her?

    The NCT is great for meeting other parents-to-be. I see my NCT group almost every week. There are a few “competitive mom” types (who apparently spend their days baking brownies and cleaning for their husbands and have already signed their newborns up to the best local schools), and there are a few “working mums” (who actually only work 15 hours per week. Jealous? me?), but on the whole they’re a good bunch and are pretty similar to me and BT. I’m sure you’ll find the same. If you have 10 minutes, google “Dara O’Briain NCT” and watch the clip…very funny.

    It’s so hard knowing when to go on mat leave. I originally thought I’d go around 39 weeks, but when I googled what other people suggested they all seemed to go much earlier. In the end I went at around 36 weeks (using up annual leave first, then going on mat leave around 37.5 weeks)…by that point I could hardly walk I was such a fatty 🙂 x

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    • Nara

      Unfortunately she’s the main client contact! It’s weird as previously I got on really well with her. Not sure what’s going on. I think she has some personal issues! Or maybe I was just imagining it!
      Yeah the NCT people seem fine. It’s always a bit awkward at first when you meet people, or is that just me?! I like the idea there is some social thingy to go to each week that isn’t drinking! Ha. Getting old.
      I’m planning on going on mat leave at 39 weeks! But I have enough annual leave left to go on hol a week before Christmas through to new year, which is 36 weeks, and I’ve already told them that my January time will be working from home! If you think you were a fatty you should see me now! I’m very wide! X

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  4. Dubliner in Deutschland

    That woman at work sounds awful. Great you were able to answer her question when put on the spot like that. It sounds like you might make some nice friends at your NCT class which is nice. When you’re on your maternity leave it’ll be nice to have some other mums to meet for coffee and play dates. x

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  5. thegreatpuddingclubhunt

    All my British friends seem to make friends with some of their NCT cohort! I’ve only heard good things, I hope you do too!!

    That is going to be hard going back to work for just one week after Christmas!! I imagine it will feel like I do right now…very little care for it-especially as you will be heavily ready to drop! I have had a week off for thanksgiving and now one more week back to work before maternity leave. I am definitely starting to care less about getting things done before going away. It’s hard to get motivated right now. And those relationships like with that person who tried to call you out, you can begin to compartmentalise them because you are going on mat leave soon! Woohooo!!!!

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    • Nara

      Yes I know, I’m already getting a bit demotivated although I don’t have long off so I can’t burn bridges! How long are you having for mat leave?
      I hope to make friends with a few in NCT! I’m not that good at the group making friends thing as I tend to be more one on one. But I think if we are all in the same boat hopefully we should make friends with at least one couple, which would be nice! And if not, it’s mildly educational!

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  6. tidleone

    I’m meant to finish work for mat leave on the 16th December and I’m off ill for the third time since September because my lungs are so crushed by the babies that I’m finding it difficult to breath – couple that with a mammoth walk to the toilet from my classroom and trying to control a class from a chair and it’s no wonder I’m finding myself completely breathless. I genuinely don’t know how other women work to the last possible second. I know I’m having twins but at 28+5 I’m all but ready to throw in the towel. Well done to you for keeping going. Make sure you take it easy though.

    Like

    • Nara

      I feel almost ready to throw in the towel! Ha! I think it must be a lot different with two babies though. I only have the one and that’s bad enough in terms of tiring, so I bet double that is even worse! Hope you get some rest soon! X

      Like

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