Parenting fails

Just a quick middle of the night worry thing today. (Diet and fitness regime going well as per. Well if you count chocolate fudge as well. I still lost a tiny bit!)

Tonight after nursery we were walking home and some of the little girls from B’s class were going in the same direction. So we got talking a bit and the other two girls started playing and B just watched, and then he (being B who doesn’t like to jump straight in) eventually decided he wanted to play as well.

It was so sweet to watch them playing and so I let him play much longer than normal. Also, T was out tonight so I also had Dog. Then one of the little girls ended up getting tired so went home with her mum, and B and this other little girl were playing around, and it was super cute so we just let them play.

B is quite fixed in his friends at nursery and this wasn’t one of his main friends so I thought it was interesting to see him play spontaneously with another kid. They were having the best time.

We were walking around by a low wall with railings and so they wanted to climb and go along the wall holding onto the railings. I guess they were at the highest bit maybe 40-50cm off the ground?

They did this a few times and I even joked with the other mum how T would never let B do this because he’s so risk averse.

Of course what then happens but B falls off. Fell on his bum and then cracked his head on the ground.

What a sickening sound.

Then he started crying his eyes out screaming. I drop Dog’s lead and other mum picks it up and I comfort B who’s bawling his eyes out.

I was like, should I take him to hospital? The other mum said she thought he would be fine (obviously she has no medical training) and to keep an eye on him. I took him and Dog home and even by the time we got to our street he’d stopped crying. And at home he wanted to eat Milky Way Magic Stars (chocolate) and watch tv and so we did that and then he had pasta for dinner. Then we did painting and some tv and we had milk and bed and everything was just normal. We even talked to Papa on FaceTime. Bed and read We’re Going On A Bear Hunt and he fell asleep.

Of course I googled symptoms of worrying signs after bumping your head. It said you worry if they are sick or don’t want food or have trouble staying awake or are in pain etc and he was none of those things.

So why am I lying next to him at 2am worrying about his head bump he didn’t even mention again?

T got in and I told him about it and he was predictably cross with me for allowing him to walk on a wall (because T wouldn’t allow him to do anything that might result in injury). Made me put the breathing monitor on him. (We co-sleep so I can hear that his breathing is fine.) I even did a light test on his pupils after he fell asleep and they dilated fine!

I guess it’s the stories like about Natasha Richardson or Michael Schumacher that worry me.

But T reminded me that he actually banged his head by the indoor pool on holiday (it was marble floor) and that was probably harder, and he was fine after that.

I guess being a parent is just constant worrying that something bad has happened or will happen to your kid.

I’ll probably stay up another hour or so and reread the worrying symptoms but so far he hasn’t had any.

Why can’t we put them in bubble wrap?

25 Comments Add yours

  1. I hope he’s okay!!!! I thought I’d share that as have been to the ER with a toddler who fell on his head, there is very little that they do for toddler concussions unless there is a break in the skull. In fact we were told not to wake him up at night to check on him (waking him up could result in tired symptoms being mistaken for concussion symptoms).

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Nara says:

      Thanks, he seems fine! I think it was just me being paranoid and reflecting on my bad parenting!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Aw that must have been awful to see. It’s really upsetting when they get hurt, isn’t it? I get so paranoid thinking about what happened to Natasha Richardson too! Our first night in Ireland on holidays Mini bumped against a table with a heavy statue ornament which banged her head. She was really upset afterwards but soon fell asleep (nursing) but hubby and I barely slept, we were so worried that night plus we also felt so guilty for not baby proofing the room beforehand. She was fine, just head a big bruise and marks on her face the next day. She’s been quite accident prone lately! These things happen, so hard to prevent everything!

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    1. Nara says:

      Yes totally! I didn’t go to sleep till like 3am. He seems absolutely fine but T (being the cautious parent) is even more self righteous now! I was so paranoid about Natasha Richardson but I believe she had a headache and B didn’t say it hurt again (I asked him) and there’s no obvious bruising. We did tonnes before bed like painting and ate dinner and played and read a story so I was really checking he seemed normal! Of course this morning he woke up crying and wouldn’t talk so I got paranoid again, but once we went downstairs he was fine. Argh parenting is so scary!

      Oh and I wish I could comment on your blogs, your last one was hilarious! X

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  3. thesmallesta says:

    I relate to this. I’m still like this with my 10 year old. It’s exhausting sometimes, literally, staying up worrying isn’t it.
    It wasn’t a parenting fail though, you have to let them learn and fail at things like this to help them develop. It was a risk assessed exercise, don’t feel bad!

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    1. Nara says:

      Thank you! I did feel I had risk assessed it but it didn’t change the sickening feeling I had when his head cracked on the ground!

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  4. kimi says:

    Oh man, parenting small children is so hard! Sunday evening we went to this festival at an outdoor mall. My 2.5 year old wanted to play in this fountain thing (other kids were in it too, so it was impossible to explain that she shouldn’t play in it). It was this little stream with giant rocks surrounding it. She was climbing all over the rocks and I was helping her jump in. I was a stresscase the entire time thinking she’d fall and crack open her head. She didn’t, but probably only because I helicoptered her the whole time. I want to give her room to explore but this one made me real nervous. Ugh. I am glad he is okay and it was a minor bump.

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    1. Nara says:

      Thank you! Yeah I think it’s a balance isn’t it? I worry about stuff happening to him but I do let him explore a lot more than his dad does. His dad would totally wrap him in cotton wool and body armour before he went out anywhere! 😂 Luckily he seems fine.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Rach says:

    Oh man I’d be doing the same thing right now. My kids always sleep with me when they are sick or I need to keep an eye on them and I think the worst all night long until I’m sure it’s clear. It doesn’t get any easier!!

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    1. Nara says:

      Yes! I’m sure it doesn’t and I hate to think the scrapes he will get into as he gets older!

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  6. Hufflestitch says:

    Allowing kids to do “risky” thing now like climbing on walls or trying to go up the slide etc, means they develop risk assessment tools now instead of later on when the “risks” involve drugs, alcohol, driving or sex. I let my son shut his fingers in drawers or doors, walk on walls, try the climbing things at the park etc. If it is under about a 50-60cm drop, it is fair game.

    I am not a medical person but I am mumma to a very energetic little boy who loves to climb! If he screams immediately after (i.e. was not winded or unconscious) and he seems well to eat, drink and play, then I don’t worry. The skull is an incredibly thick and protective bone. You have to knock it pretty damn hard to do any damage. He wouldn’t have had much force if he landed on his butt first and then hit his head, that would shorten the fall a lot!

    I worry too but thankfully my mum friends hubby is an ER doctor so if I am a bit worried he usually sets my mind at ease 🤣 and my brothers had all sorts of injuries growing up so my mum is also a pretty good resource!

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    1. Nara says:

      Thank you, I agree. It didn’t change the awful feeling I had when I heard the crack! I didn’t take him to the doctor though but I did keep a close eye on him. I’m glad the skull is so thick! So worrying!

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      1. Hufflestitch says:

        They are such a worry! But most times they are totally fine, if in doubt always get them checked out. I am pregnant with my second boy, who so far is an energetic wriggler, so I think “mum, this happened, think I should get them checked out?” Is going to be a common question in my life 🤣🤣

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      2. Nara says:

        Yeah, he didn’t show any of the symptoms that they say are worrying – no loss of consciousness or sickness or prolonged crying or complaining of pain or acting out of the ordinary! So really I knew if I took him to A&E it would be us waiting for 5 hours probably to be told he was absolutely fine. I think in the moment you doubt yourself though.

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      3. Hufflestitch says:

        You always do!! We have an after hours “doctor to your home” type service here in Australia. I have used them when I was unsure but also knew it didn’t need the ER.

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      4. Nara says:

        Oh we don’t have that where I am in London! I did actually have it when I lived out in the country. It is just an odd feeling… You feel like you are overreacting but then you think, what if?!

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  7. Amy M. says:

    When C was learning to walk and stand, she constantly hit her head HARD on the same spot above her right eye on our wooden table. She had bad bruises there on and off for months. I swore someone would call Child Protective Services on me. She was fine. About a month ago I turned my back for like 10 seconds and D rolled down the cement front steps and landed on her face on the sidewalk. I’m sure it was that same sickening sound you heard. I just grabbed her and ran in the house, I was so scared to look at her poor face and see what it looked like. She had road rash on her nose and forehead pretty bad, but she was overall fine. These kids are tough. They fall and hit their heads and get all kinds of injuries that we feel like they should be way more upset or sore from. They rebound pretty fast. I’m glad he wasn’t more injured than he was. I’m pretty sure he’ll be fine, too. 🙂

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    1. Nara says:

      Oh yes I can totally relate! B has lots of bruises as he’s always banging himself and half the time I don’t even notice until it’s already happened! It’s a horrible sound isn’t it?! I’m glad kids are tough and that their skulls are so thick! I think a lot of it for him was the shock. He honestly didn’t even mention it again so I don’t think it hurt him after that!

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  8. Well, I had to google how high 50cm is (thanks for nothing, America!) but if it helps reassure you at all — when my oldest was a baby, our pediatrician told me that falls from below counter-height can’t generate enough force to do any major damage (ie fractures and breaks, etc.).

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    1. Nara says:

      Thank you, I wish I had known that at the time! I felt so bad for letting him do something I know his dad wouldn’t have!

      Like

  9. Dani says:

    Awwwww! That’s not a parenting fail, it’s a parenting win. You have given him the opportunity to learn and refine his motor skills and balance before he gets on to higher things!m that will cause serious damage without those skills! That said, I’d have totally freaked out 😁

    The rule our pediatrician told us if the kid falls higher than their own height then definitely take them in to urgent care for a check up, or exhibits any of those symptoms you mention. Parenting is tough 😬

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Nara says:

      Thank you!! Yeah it wasn’t higher than his height – he’s about 80-something – he’s midgy, bless him. (Another girl in our NCT cohort is 98!!) He didn’t have any symptoms either. But doesn’t stop you worrying!! I think I may have to “spot” him a bit closer next time!!

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  10. Tim Connolly says:

    It was so sweet to watch them playing and so I let him play much longer than normal. Your parenting experience is super!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. What a scary situation! I’m glad it all ended well! The truth is, our kids are going to fall at times (literally and metaphorically). We simply cant protect them from everything, but we can be there for them, when they do fall.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Nara says:

      Yes, I totally agree! I felt awful at the time, but odds are they’re going to fall and they’ll be fine.

      Like

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